Love Laws Part 2

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Our relationship expert Dr Pam Spurr (On Twitter & Instagram @drpamspurr) shares her next set of tips on how to keep the new relationship fresh.

In my last Wingman column I highlighted some key ‘love laws’ when you’ve been single but have started a brand-new relationship. These are important because if you’re looking for love – and not just casually dating – these help to get your new relationship off to a good start.

Over the years I’ve met plenty of people who have started new relationships and the sexual chemistry is fantastic but it’s easy to get lazy about nurturing new relationship. 

Here are more ‘love laws’ for that new relationship 

See the good in her/him: As time goes on it’s far too easy to forget what you first saw in her/him. It’s important to make it a daily habit to remind yourself why you fell for them. 

With these qualities in mind, during stressful times (and they come to every couple) you’ll look at them with more loving eyes… even when their annoying habit - that you’ve discovered they have – is really annoying you! 

Keep the spark alive: When every day becomes the same it crushes the spark. Yes, maybe a few months into your relationship with that new person you are still thinking the spark will never die. The wise dater knows it can and far too easily. It’s easy to use simple tricks to keep things more interesting, like checking out new pubs, club-nights, restaurants, places to visit, etc., together.

Three little words: When things get tough, even quite new couples find three little words hard to say: ‘I am sorry’. The power of these words to make you feel loved-up again should never be underestimated. It’s important early on in this very new relationship to have the personal courage to say you’re sorry when you should do. If you’ve been late and you didn’t message them. If you forgot to do something that you were supposed to. All those things could do with a little “I am sorry”.

Learn to ask for what you need: When things are brand-new, it feels exciting and it was great possibility, sometimes people (especially women!) feel they don’t want to rock the boat even though something isn’t quite working for them. It’s okay to ask for what you need! As I’m forever saying, just start with the positive. Tell them something what’s great between you were great about them, followed by whatever is troubling you.

Good luck and happy dating, Pam x

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Photo by Jack Sparrow  

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Photo by Karolina Grabowska