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Is your new partner flaky?

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Our relationship expert Dr Pam Spurr (On Twitter & Instagram @drpamspurr) shares the signs to look out for if your partner is being distant.


It rarely turns out well when you end up dating a flaky person. They might be attractive, they might seem to have some really great attributes but they always have an excuse for so many things. 

From not sorting the plans they suggested, to not getting back to you when they said they would, not ringing, disappearing for a few days, and such like, they will come up with an excuse.

These lackadaisical flakes are very different to players. Players go behind your back with other people. These flakes wouldn’t know how to plan cheating!

Here are some common excuses for their flaky behaviour:

*I just forgot about the time.

*I couldn’t remember what I said I would do.

*I figured it didn’t matter that much.

*I got tied up with something else and forgot I was supposed to do that.

*I decided it wasn’t a great suggestion. But, of course, he or she didn’t tell you that!

These types of excuses simply won’t wash if you’re a grown-up, emotionally mature woman or man who wants an equal partner. Who thinks both of you should be equally responsible for the well-being of your relationship.

Of course, if you’re the sort of person who likes to have a “project” this sort of partner might be perfect for you. You might be able to encourage more positive and dynamic behaviour from them. 

However, I wouldn’t be surprised if you eventually find it an impossible task. This super laid-back, flaky attitude can be someone’s true nature. And that’s hard to change. 

Maybe leave them to find someone else who is equally as flaky as they are. And full of excuses for never showing up on time or making plans work.

Good luck and happy dating! x

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Follow Dr Pam on Twitter and Instagram @drpamspurr and at drpam.co.uk

Check out Dr Pam’s art gallery and shop for gift ideas, fantastic for a loved one: https://drpam.co.uk/art.php

Photo by cottonbro studio

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